Sunday, March 8, 2009

Enter to learn, go forth to shave.

You can learn so much by simply looking around you. I thought I'd share some priceless gems
I've been able to take in from the streets of Provo.



What the ladies in Provo do on Superbowl Sunday...


Bulldogs pee green...


Simple truths that we all hold dear...

Delta airlines also offers encouraging words from time to time.


But one of the most interesting things that I learned is that one of the restrooms in the Wilkinson Center on BYU campus now saves 40,000 gallons of water per urinal per day.

Or so said the plaque next to this water-less/hands free device.

This was my first time on campus since I left the place in December. It was also the first time I had ever seen one of these things. But things went smoothly and I proceeded to the sink to wash my hands when I saw this:

Motion detecting facets and soap dispensers!

I leave for a 2 months and everything changes. BYU's gone hands free. But at what price? I began to wonder when I turned to dry my hands and saw this...



The Dyson AIR BLADE. There were no paper towels. The instructions merely direct one to place one's hands inside and then pull them back out. It didn't make any sense. WHAT'S AN AIRBLADE?! Could this be BYU's punchline to a sick "hands free" joke? I felt like I was trapped with wet hands in the temple of doom. I approached the device desperately searching my mind for the key to understanding the one thing standing between me and dry hands. I mutter to myself, "The penitent man...only the penitent man..." But my thoughts are hampered with doubt. What about Indiana? He didn't just kneel. He kind of did a kneel/tuck/roll manuver. Who prays like that? Since when did a vacuum company make restroom stuff? Am I on candid camera? Candid camera in a restroom? What's the world coming to?

Before I knew it, I was standing above the vacuum company torture device. I hadn't thought of any way around it, so I thought I'd just put my left hand in and see what happened.

Sure enough, a thin blade of pressurized air shot from both sides of the top of the device. I pulled my hand out and it was dry. It was really quite amazing. No mortal wounds. But I did check other select restrooms in the Wilk and Library, but they haven't received the same upgrade. I'm still waiting to see what pathagen or tracking chip was implanted into my body after that experience, but nothing yet. I'll keep you posted.

4 comments:

Laura said...

Wow, you can't leave them alone for a minute can you? I'm glad you escaped with your hands. :0) Even though you already told me about that, I still laughed out loud reading it! I guess I'll have to see what changes BYU has made since I've been there... now that's been awhile!

Becca Lund said...

I may be laughing for days! I love you both dearly. Thank you for cheering me up!

belle la vie- Kristen Archer said...

I thought this was Kristi talking for a minute. I was wondering why she was seeing a urinal for a minute and then it dawned on me. Sad it took me that long to figure it out, but hey.... You guys are hilarious. I would love to try the air blade. I'll have to find a girls bathroom with one.... or just a mustache and a blindfold.

Guitarpicker said...

What will they think of next? .. But "Blade" is a fairly terrifying word to name something that goes in a bathroom.